Dear Anxiety…

A free verse poem, or something like that

Originally written 10/19/19

Art by me, Rae 🙂

I’ve been feeling amazing lately, so you must understand why I was startled. You crept up on me like a Monday morning and engulfed my face in your cold hands. I couldn’t breathe until you eased back. Still, I felt smothered.

As we walked down the street, you murmured things to me from different angles. Things about my competence as a journalist, my writing abilities, that no one reads my blogs, they don’t give a fuck. My art, that no one will like it, that it’s trash, and also not give a fuck. All the boogers are in my nose. My lips are more chapped than desert land. Well do you have a mirror so I can check? That I’ll always fight alone or say too much. To the wrong person at the right time. The right person at the wrong time. Everyone is staring at me, you’re sure of it. Then you move to the other side of me, swapping back and forth from my right shoulder to my left.

Damn! Can’t you back the fuck up? Please?

You tell me I have a million things to do so I’d better move faster. You remind me of all the things I didn’t mean to forget and all the things I tried to. You make my stomach hurt and my mouth dry. At night I settle down. Then so do you, like a musty drunken lover too close for comfort. I can’t sleep.

Sometimes I wish you’d stay away a little longer so I can feel the way I did last week and the week before. Sometimes I wish you’d come around a little less.

I am

Sincerely,

Stressed TF Out

Follow me on Instagram @imaginationbyrae or Twitter @goddessishrc for more content. Consider donations to Cashapp: $RaesViolet. Thanks for reading!

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